Monday, December 28, 2009

My Life in Adam Lambert's Song.

Whataya Want From Me lyrics by Adam Lambert

"Hey, slow it down"
Except you, you effing freak with the WI plates driving 40 on the Edens. For the love of God and all that is holy, speed up.

"What do you want from me"
I have to say, my Mother was rather particular. She was the type who would say “A- why not an A+” In all fairness I have much to thank her for, including my current day demeanor. My father says I often sound like her. Whenever he says that, I die a little.

"What do you want from me"
When Sam walks on top of me in the morning, I know he wants more food. I have a dog bowl – oh yes a BIG dog bowl for his food.

Yeah, I'm afraid
Afraid of failure. Not having money. Nothing on my tombstone. Die alone.

What do you want from me
I want to be happy.

What do you want from me
I asked myself this when I was talking to my supervisor. As my co-worker said, we are doing charity work by subsidizing some floatsam.

There might have been a time
A time when I was even more crazy and high strung than currently. I would like to attribute my growth to many things. An SO for five years who taught me much. Cats. Age. The 33 Strategies of War.

I would give myself away
I did that a lot. I fell for the wrong people a lot. I have finally met a person I am rather fond of; alas, a move is eminent.


Once upon a time
I always wanted to be an archeologist. That changed when I was 8, when my Dad told me they did not make much money.

I didn't give a damn
When I was a kid, I didn’t care about calories. I ate a lot. 240 lbs was my max.

But now here we are
In Chicago, and it is effing snowing.

So what do you want from me
In Tuesday, I asked myself that in Church. I don’t know if I was having a dialogue with cosmic powers, or myself.

What do you want from me
If this was a dialogue with God. I would want the cessation of conflict – maybe like something like universal grace.

Just don't give up
I always regretted dropping “African Art” in Vanderbilt. It was the only class I ever dropped. I felt like I lost, or I disappointed myself.

I'm workin' it out
Reading Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff.

Please don't give in
I did. I read Twilight.

I won't let you down
Here is the thing. I think I have often let a lot of people down. Like my parents, my brother, my SO at the time. I am near 30 and I should be able to carry a lot more on my shoulders.

It messed me up, need a second to breathe
During the final months of Lambda and I realized I did not want to do anything Constitutional (because of pay and a lack of brillance), I went into a shame spiral. I should have studied harder for the LSATs – gone to Columbia. I should have done better in Crim Pro – get hired at Latham and Watkins. My SO was subsidizing my existence. I thought I was useless.

Just keep coming around
I don’t eat meat much. But once awhile I love eating double cheeseburgers. Nom nom nom.

Hey, what do you want from me
There has been some talk about a list. What I really want is empathy, patience, strength.

What do you want from me
I hope that it is ok that I am a caffeine addict.

Yeah, it's plain to see
I am afraid of Lasik. Really, cutting the cornea is scary.

that baby you're beautiful
Not going to lie, my cat Frodo is a stud.

And it's nothing wrong with you
I felt bad when I realized that I often made my SOs feel inferior. I think it was a result of an ego complex. Well I still hate #1. I feel bad for #2. #3. Who?

It's me

I'm a freak but thanks for lovin' me
After reading this blog, I am sure I convinced you Dear Reader that I am a freak.

Cause you're doing it perfectly
I often admire my brother and my cousin in social settings. It seems like everyone always gravitate towards them. They are the perfect social butterflies.

There might have been a time
When I thought my views were perfect.

When I would let you step away
I burned many bridges. Many relationships. I hate losing – when I am close to losing, I step away.

I wouldn't even try but I think
I should do this more. Just act and not rationalize things.

you could save my life
To the surprise of people who knew me since high school, I am in favor of a public option.

Just don't give up
Unless it is organic chemistry.

I'm workin' it out
I need to lift more. I really like cardio because I can read while working out. For example, I read Time Out Chicago on the elliptical.

Please don't give in
I shouldn’t have sold out. Maybe I should have gone back to CA and work on the Prop 8 cases.

I won't let you down
I plan to say that in the future.

It messed me up, need a second to breathe
There was one time where I ate bbq at Smoque. It effed me up for a week. I literally had trouble breathing the next day.

Just keep coming around
I don’t really have many vices. I used to shop a lot.

Hey, what do you want from me
If Obama asked me this question, I would say reform the tax code. Incentives for green technology is fine. But the 35% marginal rate starts at $370k for a married couple. That is nonsense. It rates should be higher and the level should be lower.

What do you want from me
I want a six-pack like a Men’s Health model.

Just don't give up on me
You know what would suck, if there is a God and he is like the one in the Old Testament. He just presses the home key on his Playstation 3 and resets on humanity.

I won't let you down
It is funny because I don’t think my cat Frodo would. He often act like the guardian of my apartment.

No, I won't let you down
Let us say I have children. Will I tell them this?

So Just don't give up
I was amazed when my parents didn’t give up on the restaurant in their first 6 months. I am amazed by the fact that my Grandmother does not know how to read. She is one of the savviest people I know. Machiavelli would be proud.

I'm workin' it out
I am trying to be conscientious of what I eat. I don’t think the sentient should die for my consumption. I know, if there were dinosaurs they would eat us. I just don’t want to do it.

Please don't give in
If you do give into Twilight. Realize that the writing will suck. But you want to be Bella.

I won't let you down
I don’t think Edward does. Which is why I want a proverbial vampire with a soul.

It messed me up, need a second to breathe
One of the things that really messed me up when I was a kid was this guy in a wheelchair at the Stardust Buffet. I think my friends were laughing at him. I didn’t. The fellow and his parents were offended and approached us saying it was wrong. I should have said something before then. I should have told my friends to stop.

Just keep coming around
Resse’s Peanut Butter Cups please. And String Cheese. And Quinoa.

Hey, what do you want from me
A good potsticker in Chinatown. Really why is it so hard?

Just don't give up
Unless you are driving in Detroit. Then you are SOL.

I'm workin' it out
Writing an article about the sophistry of stock splits.

Please don't give in
I am not going to settle for Civil Unions.

I won't let you down
My debate partner at Vandy said that. She did. I was pissed. But I totally forgot about it till now. And even now, I don’t really care.

It messed me up, need a second to breathe
My parents and brother had a dog, Bobo. When I was younger, I was never really fond of the dog. He was kind of smelly, wrinkly, not the best looking canine. But he was one of our best dogs. I just finished undergrad, stayed with my parents. For some reason, I made it a ritual to give him a biscuit everyday. He followed me around in the morning just for that cookie. Then one day he had a stroke. I cried.

Just keep coming around
If you are still reading, thanks.

Hey, whataya want from me
This Christmas is going to suck, so at most, dinner.

(whataya want from me) Whataya want from me
That I can say next year will be better for all of us.

whataya want from me.

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